In Response to Opinions of Me Living Overseas

There are 2 general responses to me wanting to live overseas after I mention my dream of moving my life to India.  Both come with the same series of questions regarding "why," "when," etc. but those I'll answer another day.

The first response: "That's so cool." "I'm excited for you," or "Wow, I could never do that." "If you're over there, I really want to come visit!"

To them, I'd like to say: YEAH, I'm excited and can't wait. But, I must wait a little longer until I get the "go" to go. Yes, it will be hard at times, but I LOVE it there. For the first time in 10+ years, I feel like I have a home somewhere.  And, those thoughts aren't coming from being blinded by my love for it--I have seen the beautiful and the ugly pieces of life there, and I have done quite a bit of reading on foreign women living in India to know some of the highs/lows that will come after being there for awhile.  Secondly, yes, you COULD do it 1-if you had to, 2-if you chose to, and/or 3-if God gives you a heart for it and tells you to.  
And, finally, there will be some days, although it's hard for me to fathom, when I will miss America, the family holidays, the fattening foods, not attracting an abnormal amount of attention when visiting landmarks, having a set price unrelated to skin color, etc.  And during those times, if you tell me now that you want to come visit, I'm going to hold you to that. And I will take each one of my guests to the Taj Mahal, because I could visit it once a month and still be quite in awe of its beauty :)


The second response always causes the need for a polite smile, a deep breath, and plenty of polite nodding and tongue/passion-holding on my part:  "Are you sure God wants you to go to India, and it's not just what you want?" "Go visit other countries before you decide you're really going to India." "It's harder than you think, living in a different culture." "I think if you give good ol' American boys a chance, you'll change your mind and decide to stay here and raise a family." "Well, you don't want to go SINGLE, do you?" "What about your parents?!?"

My words to these people: I have chosen a different life from you. Or, perhaps I should say, God has chosen a different life for me than the one He chose for you.

I am in no way saying that being raised on a farm, marrying someone from the same town or next town over, having babies, baking pies and casseroles, and keeping your family within a 2 hour radius around you is bad or was the wrong decision for you to make. I'm sure you chose correctly, that it was what God had planned for you, and that it can be a truly wonderful life. For you and many others.
But, I must say, it's not terribly appealing (and almost frightening) to me.

It's just not for me.   That said, I did used to want to be the typical suburban-mom, with lots of adopted, multicolored kiddos running around. I wanted to be an OT making a decent amount of money; have a sizable house that would be the hubbub for international students and families; raise my kids on sushi, cous cous, curry, hummus, and kimchi; do short-term missions and use my OT skills that way.

Now, I just plan to do that in a place where I won't make very much money, where I will likely never eat a cheeseburger or find any "cream of ____ soup" when I'm grocery shopping, where my kids' first words will likely be not in English, and where my short-term trips will involve going to America. And I'm perfectly ok with that. Heck, I'm excited for it.

You are right in that I DON'T know that India is where I will be forever.  After a few months or years there, God could choose to move me elsewhere: Islamabad, Kabul, Kathmandu, Bangkok, Dubai, Seoul, Hong Kong, some village in Africa that is pronounced with a clicking sound--heck, even New York!  And that's okay. It doesn't mean I can't see myself living in India and then retiring there with my fellow grey-turned-henna-red-haired aunties.  
As of right now, I believe I am supposed to go to India, and afterwards, who knows?

Secondly, I am confused by you. You have supported missionaries for so many years. How do you do that and then question my aspirations to go?  This isn't a rhetorical question--I genuinely do not understand.  If it's because I'm not married: I think Mother Teresa was able to make quite an impact, and she didn't have a husband.  If it's because I'm young, rather than think of the areas I need to improve, grow, and learn in, think of the advantages I have because I am young and willing to learn and adapt to the culture that is so unlike my own. If it's some other reason, please just trust God and that He knows what is best.
And then, please read the "Perspectives" book.  Likely, you will not understand or agree with everything in the book, but I believe it will give you a different outlook on what me and many of my friends are intending to do.

Okay, end of soapbox :)

The Unknown.

Well, if I got you anything from India and you did not receive it yet (Dee, Mom, Ezekiel, tutoring kids, Mitali, Anthony, Eden, etc.), you will officially not be receiving it.  I got news from the USPS today that there's no hope.  I sincerely apologize for the souvenirs, birthday gifts, and baby gifts that you will never receive. 
 I really wanted to send out the postcards of beautiful places in India to thank my supporters, but also so that you could be reminded of my beautiful land and people. Instead, I guess this memory will have to be triggered by Google Images or the like.

It's odd, really.  "I'm not too overly attached to my stuff," I thought.  After all, I lived quite happily out of a suitcase (and bazaars) for 3 months. 

It's funny how I can look around my room and know exactly what will become garage sale or storage items the month or so before I move to India.  My stuff has been kept in boxes at home since before I came to college three and a half years ago--for the "if I ever do have an apartment I need to furnish" possibility.  I just don't need the stuff, nor do I care that much about it.
Yet this bag...
The thing is, I miss my India. I miss my friends, my babies, the heat, the beautiful clothes of a femininity that America does not have, the languages, the head bobbling.
I think waiting so long for this package was going to be a sort of Christmas for me:  feeling the clothes I haven't worn since Delhi, looking through my hindi notes, slowly reading the story of the ...what is it? magar? (whatever word means alligator!) and the bandar (monkey) and hoping my reading speed was the same as in July.  I know it's not the things that matter, but the memories.  And the learning. To be honest, I feel a bit defeated after putting so much effort into the contents of my hindi notebook. 
So, lesson learned.

With that, I'm just kind of trying to submit to whatever God has planned, and His timing.
As a general update/prayer request:  There is a chance this semester that I will not pass one of my courses. Of course, I am trying to make sure that I pass--because passing isn't just about passing anymore. The grades really don't matter to me, but the degree does because with that degree, I can make a bit of money and GO.  To my land, to my people, back to my babies.
GOING isn't so much what I want, though.
I had an epiphany of sorts a couple weeks ago:  for the first time in my life, I don't have a desire to travel right NOW.  Yes, it would be lovely to climb the streets of Prague again, and yes, a jungle safari sounds cool, and yes, if you offered me a free trip to Tokyo, my coat and bags would be ready in about twenty minutes.
But going isn't what I want.  BEING there is what I want.  Living with my people, where I can learn their language and love them.  Where I can be in constant discomfort because I have no fear when it comes to eating spices. Where I can shower with a bucket and a faucet. Where I can dance with babies on a roof at night, or hold them while they are feverish and trembling. Where I can seek guardianship and give a home to those who need one.
If it's not already apparent, I miss my India. My home.

So, I say all this because I don't know what will happen: I don't know how this course will end. That doesn't mean I'm giving up on school in any means if I don't pass, but it does mean that I'll likely be going back to India temporarily--to be with my people, to continue adapting to the culture, and to continue learning hindi--or another language, if that's God's will.

I've crunched the numbers, and it's possible.  Maybe not the most practical thing to do with limited funding, but I know God would take care of me.  But, again, I don't know what the next semester holds. 

So, I ask you to pray with me. Yes, that I pass my class so that when I next go to India, I don't have to come back :)  But also that I won't be disheartened if I don't pass.  That I will listen to God and do as I'm told.  That I will trust in His treasury and not my small bank account.  That I will honor Him no matter where I am or whatever my responsibilities. That I will know His plan is best, whatever it holds. 
Thanks.  --Marla

My Babies

First of all, I must say that I am surprised that I have had 3200+ views on my blog. When I first made the blog, I didn't think many would keep up with it too much, but I guess I should've opted for the advertising option after all to a make a few bucks :)

Second of all, my carry-on suitcase that I shipped home from Prague is currently MIA.  As in, the USPS does not know where it is.  That's reassuring, since all my cute sandals are in there, and I'm going to have to wait to spring to wear them! Nah, really, I'm pretty frustrated with it for two reasons (other than the superficial reasons of I like my saris, henna, and chappals):

1) My hindi stuff is alllllll inside there.  My hindi children's bible, my grammar notes, my vocabulary lists, my second grade grammar books, storybooks, dvds, etc.  It's so frustrating to know that I spent a month taking very careful notes so that I would understand them when I came back here, only to have the possibility of not ever receiving them :(

2)  Many gifts are inside. Hicham's spices, things for my Korean kids (who often buy me little trinkets on their own trips around the USA--which I find adorable because I am already from the USA :)), etc.  Most importantly, though, are the postcards.  I spent about $12 on postcards...which in India, equals A LOT of postcards. And I was going to send them to all of you as a way to say thank you for helping me get to India, and let  you know that the extra (somewhat little, after tuition costs) that you gave is going toward's R's monthly sponsorship. 

R is the little girl I taught to walk, after much perseverance and coaxing.  She'd scream "MAAA" every time I left the room, until she finally learned to move fast enough that she could keep up pretty well.  She's ornery, and would intentionally do whatever she knew she wasn't supposed to do with a big grin on her face.  Sometimes that grin was directed to me, or whomever else was in charge.  Other times, she'd direct that grin to her best friends, who would admire her bravery and sometimes join along in her mischief. 
R is just over the age of 2, and she's a little stinker. A precious, adorable, little stinker. She's one of the ones I would adopt in a heartbeat if 1) I were 30, 2) if I had any money after I pay spring tuition, 3) if the Indian government would play along, and 4) if God actually gave his approval on me to be a real Ma asap ;)

Anyways, I just want to say thank you for helping me help R, and I'm going to ask one more thing.

These kids at the orphanage need your help.  These aren't just any kids at any orphanage though. These are MY babies, and of course, God's children.  I'm not going to cite the verses of caring for the least of these or the benefits you will receive when you give financially.  I'm just going to ask, with all my heart, if you would please just do the right thing in a simple way.

I have had my chance to taste American over the past 3 weeks now, but starting at the end of last week, I have decided that I am done with fast food, and I am done with coffee shops.  It wasn't that I went to those places terribly often, but I went enough to waste $20 per month.  That change that I get back from Walmart will go directly into a box dedicated for her, not towards vending machines or parking meters. 
It's not that I'm never going to spend money on myself or, at times, frivolously.  But I am dedicated to helping my baby girl have food, medicine, air conditioning in the Andhra heat, nannies and nurses to care for her, and some day, an education. 

I would really love it if you would join me.  http://www.schindia.com/Child-Sponsorship/0-3-years-of-age/

$40 a month is a lot for a college student.  But most of you are not college students.  It's probably true that you may not remember how to live on a college student budget anymore :) But I know there are many other ways that you can make $40 a month possible.  And, if all else fails, you know that $40 is never too much for God to provide.

Please consider it, and help my R "Angel", my Baby C "Chelsea", my J "Gabe," my Max, my Jamila, my Heidi, my Evan, my Aloe.  Thanks & Dhanyavad

I'm Not the Same Girl...

I'm not the same girl I was before India. 
Neither would I say I am the same girl I was in India.  (For example, I walked past a nickel today on the sidewalk and did not pick it up--in India, I remember not getting in an autorickshaw because the driver wanted two nickels too many for it.)

I don't shave as often.  I got used to no one knowing what my legs looked like :)
I don't shower daily.  What's the need when it's not 40* or hotter, inducing constant sweat!?!
I don't walk on the right side of the sidewalk when passing someone.  Sometimes, I even almost turn my car into the left lane instead of right.  It could be a problem if I'm ever not paying attention :)  I also feel really stupid driving because I take so many more precautions than any Indian driver would ever do.
Also, I feel weird driving when my destination is a half mile or mile away. I walked probably 10+ miles per day in Europe, so I don't really know what to do with myself now.
I don't fear walking across American roads.  It no longer seems like playing frogger after mastering crossing the highways and walking along market streets in Delhi (which involves pressing against cars while the motorcycle that almost ran over your toe passes!)
I eat meat every day, almost for every meal, thanks to living with Betty. It's quite tasty.
But my stomach is taking its time to adjust to not having the spices I got used to in India, so everything seems a little bland, even if I know it's otherwise tasty and good. 
My clothes are not as pretty, but I don't feel like I'm in more than pajamas when I wear shorts and a tee--or even a tee and jeans!
I have a constant feeling of need to bargain for things.  I realize one does not do this in Walmart or Kohl's, but it's an itch I have.
I have to think about this thing called "time" again.  That's tough.  I always arrive at class extra early now because I have a tendency to just not look at my clock or watch.  That habit formed after piddling around (other than classtimes) for 3 months.
I'm happier.  Not just because I have awesome stories to tell and people to educate about culture--I'm just happier.  I'm more content with life.  I'm really ready for this semester and next, so that I can get a job and be an OT and get on the way to India again.

I still have all this free time, as school hasn't really picked up yet, and neither has tutoring.  I am planning on working only 16-8 hours/week right now, instead of 30-40, so there is lots of time to sit, watch I Love Lucy, read, enjoy friends without looking at the clock, etc.  I'm getting spoiled, but I'm also aware things will change very soon!  I know schoolwork will pick up, but I also know that I am going to have more time than I have had since high school to just be free.  And here, there's no 10 o'clock curfew on weekends!

Really, though, I miss my kids.  I didn't realize it so much until I got home and was looking through my pictures.  I miss my R and J and Baby C.   The older girls, too, but my heart was the with babies I lived with. 
I miss J's smiles and looking at me to see if I noticed him playing with his plastic car.  I miss R looking at me to see if I noticed that she's precariously standing on the cot and trying to get the medical supplies on the entertainment center.  I miss being an unofficial OT and cheering my babies on in their progress.  Oh, I miss 'em. 
I also miss Delhi.  My friends there were amazing. I know I saw the good and the bad of Delhi, but the people really made it what it is for me.  I miss seeing my teachers turned friends, hanging out with people, and seeing all these old beautiful areas in the middle of a shopping district.  Delhi is so much more than the people though, to me, and I really fell in love with the city somehow.  I started reading this book about Delhi, on my porch swing.  (Yeah, I have a porch swing, with a real yard.  Much better than the townhome/condo we were in last year!)  Just getting through the prologue was a beautiful experience--the author seems the grime and dirt and beauty of Delhi almost just as I see it.  He explores the city like I do, rather than taking straight paths to the tourist attractions.  I really love Delhi. 

I had prayed for God to show me a city or place that He may want me in--hence, why I travelled to the various cities on my time off there.  I don't know that Delhi is where He'll put me, but I am quite attached to the city.  I am in the beginning stages of researching OT jobs in Delhi.  With NGOs or hospitals or private clinics.  Obviously, as I am living in the USA right now, the first might be the easiest to work out with visa regulations and all that.  I also know I may need to be an English teacher or something when I first get there so that I can continue to improve my hindi before working with clients who might not speak English.   It's really not scary, but is terribly exciting to think that I may only have a year left in America.

I kind of intend to enjoy this (potentially last) year here as much as possible.
It's exciting. 

I like giving away the saris and things I got for people--although I am waiting on some of them to arrive after they make it through US Customs.  It's really fun for me to watch people love things I purchased for a whole $5! :)  In a way, I'm glad my henna and hindi books and spices won't arrive for awhile.  It will be even more exciting to open up the suitcase I haven't seen in a month and smell India, see my comical stories and grammar from the beginning of the summer, watch my hindi children's videos religiously to grasp every word and sentence structure. 

Finally, thank you for all your prayers about my transition back here.  It's gone really well.  My attitude is really good about being back.  Again, I don't KNOW that I will be leaving by next fall, but thinking of that possibility probably helps me enjoy being back a little more.  But I know your prayers have helped a lot too in that transition with my heart. 
Columbia, Missouri, doesn't feel like home.  I felt that sense of "home" and belonging (for the first time probably since I moved to Missouri) when I got to India.  On first appearance, I don't belong there.  But I'm more sure now than ever that is where God seems to be directing me. 
So now, I'm not waiting, but I am just living, until I get to go back to my spice-and-urine-scented, crowded, auto-horn-honking, cow-dung-on-the-streets, electricity-outage, politically corrupt, dark skinned, hot and humid, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful India.

Europa. Week One.

I was probably twelve when I first heard of “backpacking through Europe.”  Before that, in my mind, going through Europe was luxurious—seeing all the royal places, staying in fabulous hotels that had balconies with breathtaking views of old famous places.  In my mind there would be evening gowns and operas, es cargo, caviar, and tea (pronounced tee-ah).  Compared to all that, backpacking didn’t really sound too fun.  Backpacking is what you do in the mountains or woods when you pee behind trees.

I don’t know that you would call what I’m doing exactly backpacking, as I abandoned my backpack in India and am now toting around a 30kg suitcase (yes, I speak Kilograms and Celsius now).  It’s hardly roughing it with my fresh change of clothes each day (this may not last until Chicago, unfortunately), my laptop, and anything I could possibly need (I was really REALLY prepared for India). The roughest thing I’ve done so far is standing on a train for two hours because there were too many passengers and not enough seats.

My trip is also hardly luxurious. 

But it’s really quite fun.

I met a friend in Prague, Czech Republic, and he showed me around. The old part of the city is absolutely beautiful and has a charm.  We saw the typical tourist sites, and then just continued walking around for hours at a time.  Prague has a lot of hills, so this was an adventure in itself as we stayed at the top of the hill in a very cheap (yay!) dormitory.  Maybe it’s just because it’s my first European city that I have been in, airports not counting, but it’s still my favorite so far.  Then we went to Olomouc, some old city that is small and really beautiful.  After climbing so many steep streets in Prague, we became experts at finding shaded benches, where we could rest.  Olomouc has quite a lot of charm too!  Then, after meeting Lubo’s girlfriend, we went to his hometown and his mom gave us very delicious homemade cake and was the perfect hostess.  Then we went to a fort near his hometown and enjoyed the old ruins before crashing for the night in the city where they live.

Vienna—I guess I was only there for a little over 24 hours, but it was just okay.  Given, the architecture there is gorgeous and the gelato is delicious.  In Prague I could wander around an old part of the city and just be so perfectly content at admiring everything.  I tried just wandering around Vienna and it didn’t have quite the same feel.  I had to go to the touristy areas to really enjoy it. When I finally did the touristy areas, I didn’t have enough time to truly enjoy them, so I’ll go back sometime in the future to truly see the palaces and things.

Then came Budapest. I like the Buda side, I like the Danube River, and I like the Pest side.  Unfortunately, I didn’t get to see everything that I wanted to see because my feet hurt really bad, my stomach has been weird all week so I’m guessing I need another Cipro, and I had a throbbing headache because my body craved real water.  Not water from a bottle that says “still” and then has tinier bubbles in it compared to the non “still” water.  I just want a good glass of uncarbonated, pure, water—cold or not, I don’t much care. 

 I did get to go to the Holocaust Museum, which focused equally as much on the gypsies and Jews living in Hungary then.  Seeing the images there made me realize just how quickly humans can turn on one another.  They also made me a little ashamed to internally groan about my pounding headache and blistering feet. I know things go on in Africa and Asia that are equally as wrong, but maybe it seems a little more real to me now that this was recently, in Europe, in a VERY civilized and educated country.  But then I remember my Afghan friends showing me pictures of the Afghan queens from 60 years back dressed in beautiful, low-cut ballgowns.  I guess any civilization/government can go south pretty quickly.

I also went to the “House of Terror” which was twice the building for torture under two regimes.  Even after reading all the plaques at the museums, I’m not sure which regimes—but they were Communist and the like.  The museum was okay, but there weren’t too many English captions by the items, so it would’ve been nice to understand Hungarian.  Some visitors were really moved, but I just couldn’t understand what was going on or important about a lot of it!  The most interesting part was the torture rooms and prison cells.  One was literally as much room as the seat I am sitting in on the train right now.  A British girl said it reminded her of “the chokie” from Matilda, if you have seen that movie.  It was strange to me because these were the actual rooms—not just replicas.  Of course there are lots of other beautiful places in Budapest, but these two were the most intriguing to me.

While not feeling so well, I decided I needed to not sightsee for a day, so I planned today’s trip to a small town on Lake Balaton.  It’s this gorgeous—and I do mean gorgeous—huge lake in the middle of Hungary.  The train station didn’t have lockers in the town I randomly chose to stay at (surprise, surprise), and no one really spoke English.  But I found a place to keep watch over my stuff while I spent the day at the lake.  It’s quite shallow, but is surrounded by green hills and maybe mountains.  The water is clear, and sailboats are everywhere, and the only topless girl I saw was about 6 years old, so that was nice, too J  I guess I chose the right small town to get a sunburn in! 

I’m currently headed to Zagreb…I might even be in Croatia right now, I’m not so sure.  I don’t really know much—or anything--of what there is to do in Zagreb, but I am sure it will be a quite wonderful stop before I go to Salzburg. 

It’s been a week since I left India, and I’m just finally starting to get used to the quiet.  Even in the noisy areas, filled with tourists and buses and subways, it seems SO quiet.  There is no fruit or veggie vendor yelling at my window at 7 am, people only use their horns when NECESSARY--believe it or not!, and a crowded subway allows everyone about a square foot of personal space.  India is really loud, I’m noticing after being here J  People use crosswalks—I’m having a hard time getting used to that one.  I haven’t seen a cow in a long time or heard stray cats fighting outside my window OR seen a rat scurry across my floor (Thank goodness!)  Everything just seems absolutely peaceful in comparison. 

People also seem terribly polite.  Not so much in the smile-to-say-hello way that Americans do, but in the get-up-to-let-the-elderly-woman-sit-on-the-subway or help-the-poor-American-get-her-25kg-bag-up-the-meter-high-steps-on-the-train kind of ways.  In India, you watch out for your own people, but you don’t so much consider everyone else in these ways. 

Either way, I don’t much miss my India yet, but I don’t have the “finally-home” feeling at all in Europe like I did when I first got to Chennai.  But it’s beautiful and I am LOVING my fabulous vacation.

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Bonjour, Europe!

This is the part of my trip that is pure fun.  Thank you all who gave graduation gifts and helped me make the next 16 days AWESOME.

Currently I am sitting in Kiev, Ukraine, at the airport, awaiting my flight and lightly grazing on some white chocolate because I am too lazy to buy any pricy food.  Actually I haven't looked at the costs, but I'm just going to assume I'd have a heart attack paying so much after getting curry and naan and leftovers for $3 for the past 2.5 months!

Itinerary for those of you are curious: 
And I have no issues posting my whereabouts because it's subject to change and would probably be pretty hard to track me down :)

Today, in a few hours:  Prague, Czech Republic.  I have a friend there, whom I met flying back to the USA from Morocco, so we're going to have a lot of fun after not seeing each other in 18 months.
Friday:  Vienna.
Saturday: Budapest.
Sometime after that:  possibly Zagreb, Croatia. or somewhere else that I hear is cool, or maybe somewhere not so cool but just weird like Slovenia.  I mean, there must be something interesting about the random, less visited countries, right?
Next Wednesday: Salzburg, to see a friend from high school...whom I haven't seen since high school. He's in a choir there this summer, which is convenient for me :)
Thereafter: Possibly France to see a couple friends I met this summer.
And definitely Spain, to see MARIA LOPEZ who some of you met at thanksgiving and the lakehouse over the last 2 years.
And then Ireland, which I have to see because that's where it was cheapest to fly away from.

Then I meet Kendra & Ezekiel in Chicago so I can love on my adorable nephew.  And then I meet my old roomies and we take the bus home and I move into my new place and think about "oh, school starts in 1.5 days" and my brain will be as crazy as an Indian marketstreet.  And then life happens.

But now, starting today, I'm just gonna have fun :)  And pretend my bank account isn't going to be the size of a raisin when I get home :)

Final Moments

I leave Tuesday morning around 5 am.  And I am not ready.
Given, I have things to do still:  hang out with specific people one more time, figure out Europe itinerary (well, at least book the hostels. I won't really plan anything else but will just float around and spend time with friends and cool places). I have a few more trinkets and postcards to buy, a sari to ship off to one of my best friends in Korea, packing and weighing my suitcase--and getting rid of every gram I won't use when I get back home.

But I'm just not ready.
I finished my classes, and I know I'll keep in touch with 2 of my teachers, who have become friends.  I have the oh-s0-exciting Hindi course completion certificate.  (Which really means nothing because all my classes were private tutoring and based off my own abilities/struggles.)  I must admit though, that it's nice to take a break from verb conjugation for a bit.

But I don't want to go.  It's sort of odd to say it's an obligation to go back home, but it is.  In its entirety, my heart is here and I know I'm going to leave it behind.  I realize that I've been pampered with the free time and tourism and having the attention of way too many men (which, if you've experienced it, you know it's only fun for awhile and then the temptation of wearing a burqa comes).  My entire time here, in Delhi especially, friends have been eager to show me around and do special things.  And I haven't had to cook or clean except a few times at the orphanage.  Add to that wearing silk and chiffon saris, and I feel as though I've been a princess since coming to India, not the regular shorts and hoodie wearing Marla who verges on becoming a workaholic to be financially solid.
I know things will not be exactly like this when I live here full-time. I know it.  But I also know that my time here  hasn't been all fun and games, and that the highs have come with lows.  That's given me a good taste of what to pray about before moving here.

Last week at church, the preacher threw out one or two lines about Abraham living by faith and being perfectly okay with not knowing where he was going or when he would get there or anything else that would happen after that.   Before, I'd always liked the story of Ruth:  She went to a foreign land when she was told she didn't have to, "your people will be my people," she worked, and with God's blessing, she ended up pretty happy with Boaz. 
Sidenote:  I wasn't really counting on a Boaz, but let's just say after being here as a single woman, I have actually made a list of why I should get an arranged marriage if I'm still single after living here a few years ;)

But maybe right now I need to think like Abraham.  Which makes sense because my blog is genesistwelveone.blogspot.com
I really think I'm coming back here.  My heart says I'm never going to have an American address once I have one here.  At the same time, I have to admit that God could have other plans and there could be a different reason why I have a heart molded for this country and language.  (I already knew I love brown children, and a friend informed me that I have a special spot in my heart for Indian men lol).  I am a futuristic thinker and it's quite hard to just trust that He will put me where He needs me, even if I know He will.
So, even if I think and want Delhi to be the place for me, I prepare to leave knowing that He may have other plans.  I prepare to leave knowing that it could be a few months, or years, before coming back.  I prepare to leave knowing that I just have to submit and trust that His plan is best.

In the meantime,  I blink away tears in my eyes when I think about leaving. Sometimes they manage to roll down my cheeks, but I'm really trying to keep myself in check and just trust.  Right now, though, I have a few
more days, so I guess it's okay that I'm not ready yet.

Details of a Day in Delhi

At 8:45 I go out to find an auto. I stand on the side of a busy road and wait, and wait, and wait.  There are plenty of autos—but they already have passengers.  I’m the kind of person who hates being late, and REALLY hates it when I have to wait on people (when it’s habitual).  But, it’s India.  What’s being ten or twenty or thirty minutes late? Heck—what’s being two hours late?
So, an auto finally slows near the place where another lady and I are waiting.   I have the advantage of the autowallah choosing to pull up next to me because of my Gori disadvantage in what it will cost me.
I tell him the neighborhood & section where I’m going.  When we get there, I say “C-Block” and we drive through K block, and J block, and then finally he decides he might not know where he’s going.  So while we’re stopped on a two lane road, one of the 3 autos that are lined up next to us tells us we need to turn around.  This means that immediately after the autowallah that gave us directions moves forward an inch or two, we turn so that our auto is perpendicular to the oncoming traffic, let a few motorcycles and “scooties” pass, and then finish the u-turn.
When we arrive at C Block, I am utterly amazed that there is a billboard-esque sign that gives a map of the B and C block, WITH the numbers of the houses at the appropriate places.  Don’t worry though—it’s still India!  The sign tells us that while C block is in face a big rectangular block, B Block is about 4-5 blocks in sort of a U shape.  They wouldn’t want to be too organized…
We finally arrive at the home of my new teacher, and I sit through the world’s worst class ever.  She said my hindi is good for having been here only a short time.  THEN she taught me how to say “I am a girl.  I am from America.”  Now…I can say (slowly) “If I would be in Egypt this month, an Egyptian woman would teach me how to make Egyptian food, and if she is like Indian women, she would say ‘EAT! EAT!’ and I would become fat.”  So, why was I “learning” this? Pata nahi hai…  Additionally, every time I started a sentence and tried to figure out how to make the postpositions and verbs correctly, she said the sentence for me.  It was never what I wanted to say, and she doesn’t listen very well.  In short, I think I got a taste of what Indian schoolteachers are like—as well as the line of Indian authority and respect.  I now understand why expat kids are homeschooled or go to international private schools.  Lesson learned for any potential children I may have or adopt.  J
After the world’s worst hindi class (kudos to my engineering friend who tutored me with no teaching experience and did 100x better) I agree to come back tomorrow.  After all, she’s the friend of my hostmom and if I don’t come back at least once, I’m probably going to cause some issue between them.  But I make an excuse for tomorrow being my last day with her, because I dread coming even tomorrow. 
Immediately after, I go to a not-so-cheap coffee shop and order a mango frappe—that should make up for the rough morning class.  Mango is “aam” in hindi, but I guess they thought I said “um…frappe” so I got a real coffee frappe.  I would rather cuddle with the rat that haunts my bedroom than taste coffee ever again.  But, knowing it was my accent that caused the order and that I’ll go to the shop again, I drank it politely while my barista watched me work through presumptive verb tenses.
Thankfully, the day got much better as my teacher at the academy reviewed my verbs and only made a few corrections on the 10 worksheets I’d done over the weekend.  After the other morning class, I have now learned to appreciate the $25 per hour I spend at the school J  I feel like in the past week I’ve really progressed—which is an encouragement to keep up studying those impossible verbs.
My teacher has had an arranged marriage, and my heart reaches out to her because her husband is just not interested in trying to bond. I pause being a student for a few minutes and become just a friend with a willing ear.  She doesn’t know I’m praying for her heart in more than one way.
Class ends on a good note and then the world’s most beautiful nap happens in the midst of my homework.  I tend to sleep much better when I know the rat is probably asleep or at least hiding from the sunlight. 
I decide I need to go for a walk—which is really just an excuse to eat ice cream—so I head out into the beautiful humid weather.  My hair is an absolute disaster, but really, is that going to mean any less stares happen on the street? Nope, so there’s no reason to fix the mess my pillow created atop my head.
I order a scoop of kulfi ice cream, and again, I somehow got coffee ice cream.  I give up.  I have learned to actually enjoy tea AND olives since I’ve been here, so maybe this is God’s way of teaching me to not despise coffee, too.
Then I continue my walk to the market.  My sari blouses will be two days late, but that’s expected.  Because it’s India. 
A woman passes me.  Only with the package on top of the five gallon bucket on her head is she taller than me. Another woman who’s about that height passes me with her chubby 7 year old son.  I can’t help but chuckle at the likelihood that he’ll never reach my shoulders.
I buy a red rose for all of 20 cents.  I’m sure it’s probably twice the going rate for Indians, but the flowerwallah was cute as he was wrapping it with ribbons and some flair, and giving me a really big smile with an attempt at not-so-discreet eye contact.  Bollywood has captured this perfectly.
At a construction site a woman (who has this indescribable strength/beauty/intriguing features that I’ve found in many Indian women of lower status) makes eye contact with me as she carries 10 bricks on her head to the worksite.
My patialas (harem pants) at this point begin sticking to my legs because it’s REALLY humid.  I stop at India’s version of Starbucks, Coffee Café Day (it’s everywhere) to study and relish the world’s best caramel brownie.  I listen to a guru counsel a girl who seems to be struggling in her arranged marriage.  His advice is off, and I can’t help but yearn for her to know the Truth, as his advice just isn’t good enough to fix the situation.
At this point, I head home, not really sure that I’m heading home.  Some men start to walk a little too near me (for the time of it being dusk) and I begin a phone conversation with my imaginary husband, who makes me practice my hindi.  The conversation lasts awhile as the men were not really increasing in distance from me.  It’s a good thing my imaginary husband is really sweet and VERY patient with my hindi when we talk on the phone J
I passed P block and then W block, which I’m not sure how, but is next to E block, which is one of three places from which I can find my home.  I smile at an aunty on the street, catch myself staring at the other white people I see, and crane my neck to see the cricket games through the trees.
In my neighborhood, I head bobble hello to the man ironing clothes next to the park, hold my breath while walking past the overflowing dumpsters, and admire the gorgeous, sleek, and fit cats rummaging through the garbage.  I scoot to the side of the road only once out of the 20 times I am honked at, smile at the cutest, most serious four year old boy carrying a backpack that must weigh as much as him, and open the gate to our building. 
I walk in the door, take off my chappals, and almost immediately step on the pieces of a chicken bone that the dog had sometime earlier been enjoying.  After washing my feet, smiling at the maid who will not talk to me, and grabbing some purified water, I come into my room, switch on the A/C and my laptop, and rip off my long pants in exchange for the much preferred shorts.  I cringe at my fluorescent white legs, plop down on my not-exactly-soft bed, and write this—so that maybe you can picture my beautiful India and see why I want to come back.

2 Lists (Portions of them)

What I’ve Learned From India

Increased ability to hold my breath while walking through “bahut badbu”

Taking a bucket shower and Handwashing clothes
Mangoes are better in South India
Maids are really nice to have.  The most I have cleaned is by putting away my laundry, after she irons it.
Saving time with bargaining by initially giving a reasonable price, sticking to it, and walking away if they don’t accept.  70% successful in not wasting my time or listening to how this is the finest quality and best price available in the whole of the city
A few hindi words and grammatical things.
How to read Hindi when its handwritten (a huge difference from the books)
Not to cry when there are no trash cans and it’s necessary to throw my trash on the street
How to pin a sari so that it will stay in place through ANYTHING
That the most naked feeling happens at the spa when you’re calves are visible to the Indian man giving you a pedicure.  I seriously almost requested a lady.
People really don’t see white ladies in saris often
How to walk alongside an Indian road within a few inches of the oncoming motorcycles, without stepping in a puddle or a cowpatty
How to cross an Indian highway calmly
I’m an Indian city girl. 
I’m more in love with Bharat than I was back home

America’s Advantages

GPS is available

Roundabouts make sense and are spread out rather than 40 in one path.

A man peeing on the sidewalk is a rare sight

You can trust that any restroom will have toilet paper and not water all over the floor
Food agrees better—not with the palate, but with the stomach
Electricity only goes off in cases of horrid weather or neighborhood construction
A hot shower can be taken even if you forgot to push the hot water heater switch
Mama lives there and she makes really good Afghan food.  I miss my qabali (and my Mama)
It’s safe…safer… to be out alone at night as a girl
Yards

If I want to talk to someone I dont have to consider the time difference

It’s okay to jog around the neighborhood
And friends and family...but you knew that.

For you, Mom...

Mom said I needed another blog update.  I said there wasn’t really much to write, but she said, “anything.”  The younger sister/brat in me wants to write “This is a blog update.  Hello.  I’ll talk to you in 7 hours, Mom.  Goodbye.”  But I guess I can come up with something a little more creative.  Or try, I should say…I can’t promise that it will be interesting though.

I learned today that 2 new guys will be coming to live in my house in the next two days.  One is a Swiss who lives in Hungary (which is great, because I was planning on going to Hungary anyways in Europe J) and the other is…from Spain, possibly? Either way, it should be fun.  I enjoy taking people on their first autorickshaw rides.  For those of you who have been to India, you understand what I mean…

I get to hang out with my friend from France tomorrow, which I’m quite excited about, as I haven’t really got to see her too terribly much over the past two weeks, with our class schedules being opposites.  Since I now have two friends in France, I guess that will be one of my stops through my journey there.  It isn’t that I have never wanted to go to France.  I mean, I did watch the Mary-Kate and Ashley movie “Passport to Paris” like 30 times when I was ten  (For you Ashlierla:  Bonjour, bonjour,…omigosh!)  But I have felt that you just can’t go to the Eiffel Tower alone.  I felt that way about the Taj Mahal too, but that solution sat next to me on the flight from London.  Now, who knows?  I might just stop and have lunch with my French friends or I may stay awhile and really learn to enjoy the country. 

Today my teacher was sick so I got to go to Sarojini Nagar/Babu Market instead of class.  I have decided if I am not married once I arrive to live in India full-time, I will submit myself to some aunty who can pick out whatever dark Indian guy for me and after the arranged marriage, I can buy a new sari and a new pair of sandals every week with his salary.**  Okay, slight exaggeration…but I really REALLY love shopping in India.  And I’ve never been a crazy shopper—more of the severely frugal kind so I can do things like go to Europe J  Anyways, I got 5 pairs of shoes for $22 today…I mean really? Given, they may break after a few months, but who cares for that price!

 **  In my rereading of this, I think I may have some readers who might actually take that at face value.  Please know the above is not serious.

Also, today, my flight-from-London-seat-partner-turned-friend-turned-chauffeur-turned-really-good-friend-who-does-really-crazy-things-like-taking-me-to-a-flower-market-at-4:30am-and-drive-forever-to-the-Taj-Mahal returned to Canada.  That was a bit sad, as we’ve done quite a lot together in the 2 weeks I’ve been in Delhi.  But I’m glad I have a good friend out of it, either way J

Tonight, my Bengali host family and I went to see Cocktail.  It’s a fairly cute movie, and I understood zyadatar of the humor.  Oh, did I mention that there were no subtitles?  I guess I’m just getting used to not comprehending chunks of conversation.

Now, I get to go read something about a “Bandar” and whatever-the-hindi-word-is-for-alligator-or-crocodile.  My teacher has recommended that I read aloud to improve my intonation and flow of speech.  But, in English, I can read fast because my eyes look ahead and give my brain time to process what I see before my tongue gets there.  In Hindi, my eyes and tongue stick together, making for some very slow and painstaking sounds.  I’m sure of this because the dog never stays in my room when I start.

This isn't the most interesting post.

So, in all honesty, I don't really feel much like writing.  It's just that I'm a student now, and that comes with the highs and lows of being a student, which you already know from your own days as a student.  But if you want to hear what's been going on, or don't keep up with facebook photos, here's a synopsis of my past week.

Taj Mahal.  GORGEOUS.  Way worth the 4-5 hour drive.  Way worth my friend having to pay $40 "because he had a foreigner in the car" (aka police probably need money for their wives' shopping habits...)  Sumit told me my face was priceless when I first stepped through the gate and saw it.  I believe him.  I could've sat there for an entire day, never tiring of soaking up its beauty and the curious happenings of tourists.  Had I done this, i'd have had to wear an invisibility cloak as my sari attracted quite the attention of Indian peoples.  Only downside was that the inside wasn't well ventilated, we couldn't go into the downstairs mauseloeum (I'm not going to bother googling how to spell that right now), and that there's no way to memorize every detail of the artwork.

Fatehpur Sikri.  I can never remember the first word.  Sumit's dad suggested we go there after the Taj, so we did.  Way worth it.  When you go to the Taj Mahal on your visit to see me when I live in India, go to this place, and plan to spend quite a bit of time seeing everything.  We only saw part of it, but it was really cool.  It was also cool because when I was 10 I read one of those "Dear Diary" kind of books by one of the princesses who would have been at this place.  Amazing how a 5th grade reading level book teaches world history way more efficiently than my high school teachers did...

Dhaba.  Dh (with a huge exhale) -AAA-Ba.  Not Bha.  Ba.  No, you're saying it wrong.  Nope, that's not it either.  Eh, I guess since you've now tried 15 times and gotten it sort of correct 3 times, we'll pretend that counts as being able to pronounce it.    Yep....that's how my hindi is going.  That and the confusion of what people actually say and what I am supposed to say--be it grammar, pronunciation, or whatever--that's how my hindi is progressing.  It's a slooooowwww trek.  What I do know is that my reading is slowly getting faster, my vocabulary is increasing although I may have to think about the word 20 seconds after the sentence it was in before I recall it's meaning (consequently losing the rest of the sentence), and my perseverance is great.  Haha, I'm trying to keep a positive outlook, but it can really be frustrating at times to not be naturally good at picking up the language/not being the best auditory learner.

CHURCH!!! It was so good, SO GOOD, to worship with other Christians who speak English yesterday.  Everyone was so friendly and wanting me to know that they are there for me if I need them.  The minister spoke in English (there is sometimes hindi translation, but not that day).  The songs were a mix of English and Hindi.  Because there was a powerpoint, I could even sing--or read at least--the hindi parts, so that was quite exciting for me.

Stomach.  I have yet to meet a curry my mouth or eyes can't handle.  This might not be the best for my stomach, so its possible I could have stomach cancer or ulcers right now and I'd never know. I'm just used to being fairly uncomfortable/queasy (or more than fairly) all the time, and I look forward to the day when I will be able to remember what a normal stomach feels like.

Birthdays.  I have had 3 birthday celebrations in the past 4 days.  It's been good for me to be with people, and at 2 of the celebrations, everyone mainly spoke Hindi. It's encouraging to be able to pick up pieces of the conversation. Downside--it's only pieces of the conversation, so you just have to smile and keep trying and hope you nod or shake your head at the right times. Also, it's not only one conversation, but 3-6 conversations, which is just plain difficult.  But I like a challenge, and I love the people, so it's okay :)

Also, I've pretty much decided I don't want to leave.  I only have 15 more days here, and although I'm excited for my undergrad graduation present to myself/trip to Europe,  I don't really want to leave.  I think I'm going to feel a little bit like a toddler being dragged out of Chuck E. Cheese's.  So...you can pray that I'll leave willingly and be content wherever I am... Please :) 

Disorganized thoughts.

So, in America, I'm just an average girl.  I'm not saying that to get lots of reassuring comments or anything, I'm just stating a fact.  I'm no supermodel...
In India, I'm still not a supermodel.  But that doesn't mean I can't turn heads no matter where I go.  I know this sounds egotistical, but hang with me for a minute: 
Yeah, I'm white, and that isn't the most usual, even here in Delhi.  Given, I think I prefer the not so upper class areas, too, so there really aren't as many foreigners where I like to be. 
Yeah, I'm tall.  Sometimes I just want to wear my four inch heels from home just to see how much more attention I could get ;)  Anyways, even though the stares are 90% less than they were in the village, the way I deal with them is by feigning ignorance but smiling secretly to myself...and sometimes then making faces so that I can watch their reaction out of the corner of my eye. 
It's quite fun, really.  The orphanage director's kids told me that was an effective method for their previous babysitter :)
The other way I deal with it, especially on days when I wear a sari...like tomorrow...is by turning my internal radio on.  Typically, it's to "Sexy and I know it" (or whatever the title of LMFAO's song is).  Other times I just REALLY want to break out in dance to whatever the music is playing on the store's speakers.  This is something I'd never do in America, but here. . . . where I already stick out. . . the temptation is big.

Anyways, there's a point to this I promise. Yesterday, my crazy awesome hindi teacher told me that the teachers at the school talk about me.  I don't know what all they said, but something about there being a glow about me.  Her explanations to them were that I'm a believer, and it's just Christ shining through. So it's cool that even in an indirect way, I'm an opportunity for her to witness.  I've honestly never been that person to "glow" so I think India also has an effect on me.  I just love it here.

I love that I can wear huge pants (patialas?) and still be in fashion.  I love that I can eavesdrop when people assume I can't understand.  I still can't--but I can get some verbs and prepositions at least :)  I love that everyone here has brown skin.  Brown/wheatish skin is really so beautiful, and I'm learning to be content with my inability to ever seem tan. 

I love that the food is AWESOME.  I love that I have good friends here, and that those friendships will continue to develop before I leave.  I love that safety pins are just a part of life, and that it's okay if you wanna fit your clothes the way you want, and no one will judge you. I love that I'm splurging when I pay $6 for food.  (It's goign to be a rude awakening going to restaurants in Europe!)  I love the heat, and that I handle it more happily than the Indians I pass on the street. 

I love roaming about and being shown random parts of Delhi by friends. 

I don't like that I can't keep up with the amount of vocabulary or grammatical nonsense.  (Since my physics class freshman year, I've not had such an opportunity to be the clueless student). It's sort of frustrating not to be naturally good at the language (although I'm still doing plenty fine) and it seems every time I learn a new thing, I forget the last thing I learned. But I know, and thankfully can recognize, that it will be good in the long run for me and whatever God has planned next. 

I love that my homework is to stand in front of the mirror and move my tongue back and forth rapidly to loosen it up so that I can then say "rha." 

I love that this is the first summer I'm not at home freezing in the air conditioning, wearing a blanket around the house.

I love that I get to look forward to coming back here someday. I like that I have my list of wants (and some requirements!) for my future apartment/room here.  I like window shopping to see how I can decorate said place. 

I love that I can't explain why I love India so much.  It's truly just a God thing.  All my other explanations make no sense.

Thinking futuristically:
Honestly, I know I SHOULD work in America first before coming back here (remember, this is after one more [final] year of grad school).  That's the practical thing to do. But really... I don't know what God's plan or timing is, but I'm going to be ready to pack a few suitcases and hop back on a plane at any given time.  I still have no idea or preference as to where I want to end up in this nation. But I guess that's good as I'll be pretty willing to go wherever.

I'll begin my first day of not being a student in 353 days (Hey, Kendra, you turn REALLY old and 26 that day lol).  And I'd be okay with being back here in 400 days. . .

I don't know God's plan, but I really want to grow old here.  Have a family--whether just an Indian church family or a family of little brown children.  Get to know the neighbors and have chai and just love on them.  Have a huge balcony and/or a rooftop to enjoy the nights and city view with friends.  Use this hindi that I'm learning for work, play, and a higher purpose.  Master driving through the streets.  Wear saris and salwar kameez daily.  Have friends that become family.  And grow old while all my Indian friends dye their hair red with henna. 
I just want to love on India forever...
I know that our true home isn't on this earth, but I think the home that He has planned for me while I'm on this earth is here. I love it.

Voh blahblahbblahbhlahblahbhbhalah raha hai.

So, I missed several hours of class last week because my stomach was having a civil war within itself on Friday and Saturday.  Needless to say, those hours will all probably be made up this week and next...which means I'm likely going to be DRAINED every day.  Drained, but having some fun too :)

Even with only 3 days of class though, my hindi is REALLY improving.

My verb conjugation is better, as is my vocabulary, as is my ability to listen when ek yaar speaks REALLY fast. (Hence the title of today's post). 

While feeling as though I was lying on my deathbed (slight exaggeration), I watched 3 Idiots--a wonderful little 3 hour, critically acclaimed film with my favorite Bollywood actor.  This is probably the sixth time I've seen it, though likely only the third time I've actually paid attention to the whole thing. 

Even though I know the story and can do ridiculous Bollywood dance moves to all the songs, this time was different.  This time, the subtitles were turned off. This time, I could pick up about 100 new vocabulary that I learned only in last week.  This time, I felt like I could point to the buckets in the bathroom stalls and other props in the film and go "oh yeahhh.... that makes sense now."

So, I don't really know what else to say :)  Par, shayad ek din meri hindi bahut acchi hogi? 

He Reigns.

Within the last 2 days, there has been an intense spiritual battle in my life.  After a rough start, yesterday I told my testimony in hindi.  With help, of course, but it was incredible to know that I speak enough hindi to (poorly) communicate what God has done in my life.  Satan became very aware and chose this time to attack.

Today Satan almost won the battle over me, bringing me to a state of total desperation, hopelessness, and the removal of love for myself.  After five hours of despairing, which seemed like an eternity, I gave it to God.  Hope abounds.  I washed my face of my tears but felt as though I’d just stepped out of the baptismal waters again.

The Lord is good.

He doesn’t expect us to be perfect, but just asks that we come to him with all of our crap and lay it at His feet.  Over the past 2 months of preparing to come and being in India, I have been laying things at His feet, piece by piece.  But today was the first time in a very long time that I was able and ready and willing to give Him ALL of it.  Tears are streaming down my face as I write this. 

My dad sent me an email earlier saying “God doesn’t do anything the easy way—at least from our perspective” and that the lessons He has for us require endurance and total reliance on God.  My dad’s right, as he usually is.  I reached rock bottom today, and it’s lower than the spot I thought was rock bottom previously.  It was the worst feeling I the world—to hate yourself.  But God pulled me up, and not just to the bed I’d collapsed by, but all the way to the throne, where He resides and rules.

I have had two visions before.  They were both this time last year—almost to the day.  The first was a face.  A black face.  With. ...  nothingness … for eyes.  It was either nothingness or this pinkish red color for the mouth, I don’t remember.  I was petrified when I saw it, and a fear unlike any other gripped me.  I knew right away it was a demon, and I closed my eyes and prayed desperately that it would go away.  That face had covered the face of a friend who is Hindu.

The second vision occurred a few moments later.  With my eyes closed and heart racing from fear, I saw a lion cub.  It was playing with another, carefree, and tumbling about in the dirt.  The image zoomed out and I could gradually see the whole pride of lions, and an unspeakably beautiful sunrise.  As the sun came over the horizon, I saw a male lion, majestic and strong, climb up on a big rock and roar in the most powerful manner.  I knew by that roar that it was a representation of God/Christ and that He REIGNS.  My fears disappeared instantly, and I cannot describe the peace and comfort and knowledge in Him that I had.

In Bangalore, I went to an ISKCON temple (one of the most famous Hindu temples).  The whole experience was intensely spiritual, God showing me a piece of the devil’s workmanship, and the power that evil has over people.  On my way out, I glanced around at the souvenir kiosks, just to see what they had.  I saw the face I had seen last summer depicted on one of the souvenirs.  It was not a similar face or one of the abstract faces, but THE face I had seen.  I get goosebumps even thinking about it, as I recall the intense feelings of both fear and evil.

Thankfully, today--now, I have the same feeling as I did when I saw the lion.  The Lord REIGNS.  My hopelessness has disappeared, and the peace that transcends all fears, worries, and doubts—it reigns.

Praise be to God.

Thank you for your prayers.  I know many have especially been coming to the Lord this week on my behalf.  All I can say is THANK YOU. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.  Now, please thank and praise the Lord with me.

Independence day...

Today is sort of a bummer. July 4th was celebrated on June 30th in New Delhi, and I didn't know it :(  It's sort of my favorite holiday, so I'm going to be missing sitting on the diving board at the lakehouse watching the fireworks and eating Mississippi Mud and jello salad.  (I'm sort of specific, aren't I?)  That said, please have some extra of each for me.  Don't send pictures though because I don't want to get even more hungry for things I can't have!

I really like New Delhi, and I really like not being on my own anymore!  It's so nice to have friends and the family to hang out with when I'm doing sightseeing or just sitting at home or eating or going on walks!  Last night, Sumit picked me up from school and after a dinner which only made my cheeks turn a little pink, we went to India Gate, which was gorgeous.  I say this to let you know that if/when any of you come to Delhi, you need to go at night because it's pretty much the most perfect spot I've seen in India at night :)

My classes are going pretty well.  Right now it's just private classes, so I can't rely on any other classmates to answer questions or help me out with vocabulary--which is good because my confidence in speaking is at a level 0. I've apparently really impressed the instructors because I know "so much" by only teaching myself.  Given, their "so much" is like my "I haven't hardly learned anything yet!" but I'm probably always going to think that way.  I officially understand past tense...I think. I am completely clueless on the presumptive tenses (she must be blahblahblah, he would be blahblahblah) but my vocabulary is increasing, so that's nice, even if it's in small amounts. 

My teacher this week is my age, and she's quite wonderful.  She's also a Christian, which is awesome because now I'm learning some religious vocabulary, too.  And she's invited me to hang out with her basically all Saturday after classes and then we'll go to her church that night.  I haven't been to a non-village church yet, because the only ones I saw in Bangalore were cathedrals.  (I don't think it would be very spiritual if I'm just admiring the columns and windows and other architectural things, not to mention that the masses were probably in Kannada or Hindi or something not English.) 

Anyways, I can't help but feel that this doesn't seem as positive today, so I'm going to quit typing.  Let's just say there have been some turmoily things inside and so prayer is appreciated...

And, hello, hindi vocabulary.  We meet again.  Hum again milte hain. (?)

When you think things can't get better...

Somehow, they do.
For those of you who haven't seen my pics on facebook, I'm having an awesome time.  I split the last week between Goa (Hawaii of India) and Mumbai (Bombay).  The first was great, beautiful, relaxing, a great opportunity to be American because there weren't any streets to walk on and keep my eyes down.  I wore a swimsuit most of the time--albeit with a tshirt over it 95% of the time--was the subject or background of many Indian family photos, the subject of many teenage/college boys' cameraphones while they pretended I was just near the background, and the girl who watches a lot of Big Bang Theory while it pours for 2 days straight when I couldn't take any more verb tenses.  Overall, I'd say Goa was a success, even if I didn't exactly sightsee or do any of the things it's known for.
Then: Mumbai.  Ahhh, Mumbai.  "Once Upon a time in Mumbai." (Okay I know only 2 of my friends who read this got that.)  STUNNING architecture.  Good job, British imperialists. Lots of slums, but maybe it didn't seem so bad because I'd seen some less than ideal housing in the villages too?  I paid a whopping $60 for a full day of tour.  I was DRAINED after 8.5 hours.  But still went out and retook pics at the Taj Mahal Palace and Fort (Hotel, not the Taj Mahal you know) and Gateway of India...because it was finally sunny.  During that 8.5 hours I saw many cool things, most of which are not in my camera.  Partly because it's inappropriate to film religious activities, and partly because it rained 23 cm (I think that was the number mentioned in the newspaper) that day.  Most of that was in the 3 hours I was stepping/wading through puddles getting from place to place...or from place to the car! 
Here are some spots I went, and I give you permission to google image search them so I don't have to explain a lot:  Gandhi's house. Hanging Gardens. Jain Temple. (I thought I'd stepped into another wedding then, because a girl in a beautiful pink sari was holding something special over her head and everyone was looking at her, and there was a parade, with a guy with his face covered.  YAY! wedding.....no. It was just the arrival of some guru.  I'm sure he's really famous, but I have no idea who he was. He wasn't a groom and that's where my disappointment lies :)) Mosques, other temples... 2 separate dhobi ghats.  beautiful churches and governmental buildings. Victoria Terminus (sorry if that is a butchering of the name). The homes/apartments of Bollywood stars.  It's possible I saw someone famous and didn't know it.  It's more likely that I just saw rich people who live next to the stars.  And lots of other places that I wrote down in my journal that my driver took me to because the tour was on my own time...and the monsoon's time.
I saved my bag from a pickpocketer who tried to sneak her hand in it while I was in a tourist spot. Now, I'm slightly anxious that the third time will be the charm and that they'll succeed next time :) Thankfully I could store about 398439 rupees in my bra, and no one would know. :P
Then the next day I was crazy tired, so I laid in bed or the hotel pool all day--save for a 2 hour walk around Colaba.  Do I always get this lazy when school is about to start, because I was feeling pretty whiny because I know my brain is going to ache once these language classes start up!
And, now, as of today, I'm in New Delhi--where I will be for the rest of the time I'm in India, unless I do day trips. (Check that--WHEN I do day trips, as I'm definitely going to the Taj Mahal...I feel like that name should be said with an angel's chorus). 
It's WONDERFUL.  I'm living with a woman and her 13 year old son who are Bengali.  Currently there's a Japanese guy here too, but tomorrow he's leaving and a French student is moving in.  (They are here to learn English, which is what my school is mainly known for).  My room and the apartment are so beautifully and TASTEFULLY decorated that it's really nice not to be surrounded by chaotic nor empty walls.
Downside is that I'm going to get lost anytime I go anywhere.
What else is cool? I'm starting private hindi classes on Monday. That's still terrifying because I'm still embarrassed and completely not confident in my speaking.  Rightfully so, I must say.  However, my vocabulary is still improving because I can read more and more of Harry Potter without stopping and saying "HUH?"  Every time people learn that I am learning hindi, they want me to say something and then the words just can't come out.  They come out better in my head, I guess :)
On people:
And I have a superbly awesome friend and soon, I'm guessing, I'll know 10 or more of his friends :)  We ended up sitting next to each other on my flight from London way back in May, and now I'm going to be torturing him with my hindi and trying to catch one word in every paragraph that flies out of his mouth.  (Think the "adverse side effects commercial guy, but in a foreign language you're trying to learn).
I'm really excited about meeting the other foreigners in my classes, as well as my teachers, as well as the French guy who will be staying here across the hall.  I like meeting other people.  I like meeting people I know I can trust and try new things with in this new place. 
I like meeting airline crews, as I'm now friends with two of them.  I like eating curry at home with people instead of being alone at restaurants.  That said, I also like reading hindi books in restaurants while waiting for food as the staff gets friendlier and less "I'm the server, you're the guest."  I like being that weird American on the flights that entertains the kids who are sitting in front of me by tickling them through the gaps in the seats.
Basically, I'm really happy here. If you didn't get that already.